Of all the stages of a relationship, the first stage is probably the most exciting.  This is the romance stage, the beginning. There’s dating and getting to know each other, and each of you is on your very best behavior because you want to woo the other person.

This stage is often called the honeymoon period, because everything is fresh and new. Everything the other person does probably seems wonderful. You laugh at his jokes, and don’t mind the person’s flaws. In fact, you may even find his flaws endearing. Just like anything new, it can be a great deal of fun and seem adventurous.

The next two stages are the make or break stages that many couples never make it through. They account for things like very short relationships and marriages. The second stage is commonly known as the power struggle stage.

This is when the newness starts to wear off, and usually starts somewhere between six months to a year after the relationships starts. It’s during this time that things start to get serious. Everything isn’t as cute and endearing as it was in the beginning.

Each person in the relationship is trying to get his or her needs met, and they’re starting to notice where the other person falls short in doing that. If you’re in this stage, take a step back. The things you’re finding fault with in the other person are probably flaws that you have also.

If a couple can get through this stage, the relationship has a much better chance of lasting. Unfortunately, many couples try to change each other in the second stage. This leads to break-ups. Honest communication is the key to getting past it. Be understanding, and realize that you have shortcomings, too.

The third of the stages of a relationship is where you realize that you can’t change the other person, and you stop trying. If you came to that realization by talking with your partner and being understanding, then congratulations are in order!

This stage for you will be one of learning to be content with what the other has to offer and learning to take care of yourself. If the power struggle ended badly, then this is the stage where you’re likely to end the relationship.

The next stage is that of commitment. You realized you couldn’t change each other but you still made it work, and you know you want to be together.  Now you can move on to a true partnership, which is the last stage.

Many couples bounce from stage 2 to 3 several times before moving on to commitment. By understanding the stages of a relationship, you’re at least aware of what’s happening and why.

Saving the Scorpio Woman Relationship

Your first step should always be to distance yourself from your ex and this is an action to preserve your sanity as much as it to make a statement to your ex boyfriend.  This step will stop you fixating on your ex and give you the space to concentrate on your own needs and requirements to help you get through this stressful time.

Make a serious attempt to reconnect with your family and friends and accept any help that will undoubtedly come from those who love and care about you.  If you’re serious about figuring out how to get your ex boyfriend back it would be a huge mistake on your part to isolate yourself.  With people around you it means you’re not sitting at home crying and obsessing about the breakup of your relationship or your ex boyfriend.

Now, as you’re spending time with family and friends, find out from them what they saw as the downfall of the relationship.  I’m sure your boyfriend would’ve told you what he thought as he walked out, and you no doubt have your own ideas on what went wrong and why.  However, sometimes it takes the perspective of an outsider looking in to make sense of a relationship.  So if you seriously want to figure out how to get your ex boyfriend back then ask others for their opinions.

Your next move is to make sure that given what you’ve heard back from family and friends regarding their take on the breakup, that you now think for yourself. You either agree or disagree with what’s been said and of course you’re doubtless going to get different opinions from them all.  So take some time to weigh up what’s been said and the final decision is yours.  Yes you started out wanting to get your ex boyfriend back, but is it still what you want?  Perhaps you’ve heard some ‘truths’ that now put that quest in doubt?  Perhaps you’ve had time to come to terms with the breakup and you can more readily accept it?  Whatever and wherever you are, be clear on what you want before you make the next move.

If you’re still determined to go ahead and win him back, then your next move is to call him and to do so calmly and without emotion and drama and talk to him about the way you feel.

How to Make Contact With an Ex

You’re going to need time to think, time to figure out what you want to do and then time to pick yourself up renewed and confident.  Failing to take your time and get through these three points means that you run the risk of any contact with your ex being a failure and a waste of time.  You’re really looking at least a month to get through all of this, longer if possible.

Once you’re sure that you’re ready, call your ex up on the phone and make the following conversation sound as casual and laid back as you possible can:

“You’ve had time to think!

And you think it would be good if the two of you could meet up someplace neutral for a quick coffee and have a chat!

As I said, don’t come on all heavy because that won’t work!

To make contact with an ex you then meet up, sit down and talk and explain your thoughts to your ex as well as you can.  You don’t want this meeting to be a long one, just explain, apologize if you have stuff to apologize for and then ask for a second chance.

You then have to give your ex their moment to tell you what they think.  Listen sincerely to what they have to say and make sure that you’ve understood their point of view, you don’t necessarily have to agree with them, but you have to make an effort at understanding them.

Then you tell your ex that you’re going to give them some time to think things over and you leave it at that.

No hysteria, begging, pleading or crying!

To Get Lover Back Show Some Self-Criticism and Tenderness

First of all understand that guys hate it when girls are needy, so if you were calling him 24/7 and wanting to be around him more than you should, then you’re going to have to understand how to stop that before you make nay attempt to figure out how to get your ex boyfriend back.  If you were always checking his cell and wanting to know where he was and who he was with, then you’re going to have to stop that right now.

Instead to get your ex boyfriend back you have to trust him and show him that you trust him.  Do this by telling yourself that he has a life and he has a right to a life that does not include you.  Just as you have your friends and your life, he MSUT have his.  You do not ALLOW him to have a life, it is just how healthy human beings exist with each other, they understand that their partners are entitled to have space of their own.

You no doubt have some abandonment and self-esteem issues going and that really is nothing to be ashamed of.  What you need to do is to face your issue and perhaps find some professional to talk to.  Again don’t be ashamed of this, most of us have some kind of issue.

Work on your confidence by getting out and meeting new people and putting yourself in situations where you would not normally go.  It’s can be a scary thought, but your best way to get your ex boyfriend go is to make a life for yourself WITHOUT him.  Once he sees that you are brave enough to attempt new things without him and put yourself out there on your own, he will not feel as though he has to provide everything for you.  He will not feel pressurized that he has to be your whole world and he will relax and be happy to be back with you.

So don’t rush straight in at the beginning of the break up to get your ex boyfriend back, give you and him some space and work on your needy stuff so that your future together is a healthy happy one.

!!!  Want to know if any of the products on my site might help your situation, then just CONTACT ME, tell me a little bit about your situation and I’ll let you know whether I think a product might work for you – all the best Dana !!!

How to Stop Being Needy

Some people can’t cope with break up pain and instead find themselves turning to anti-social and destructive methods to try and get through it, but these methods will bring their own problems long term.  I’m talking about drugs, alcohol and a culture of not valuing themselves in sexual situations.

Break Up Pain

If you find yourself in this position where you’re making dubious decisions that you perhaps wouldn’t have made if you were not dealing with break up pain, then you really need to stop and take a moment to look around at where you really are emotionally.

If you have no one to talk to about what you’re going through, then you should consider talking to one of the professional services that exist just to help people who find themselves alone and in crisis.   It’s not a stigma to reach out for help in whatever way you need to.  Each and everyone of us has to ask for a level of help at some point in our lives and the wisdom is knowing that it is a natural and normal thing to do.

Another route you must not go down if you’re dealing with break up pain is to isolate yourself from those people in your life that may want to be there for you.  Staying in night after night and avoiding people in your family or social circle will only prolong what you’re going through.  Instead, force yourself to re-connect with those who care for you and want to help you.

What you should also try your best to avoid at all costs, is to rely on your ex to help you through this period.  It will seriously do you no good if you turn to your ex when you’re struggling with break up pain.  If you do, you will find yourself very easily drawn into a situation where you might end up remaining emotionally attached to them and or having sex with them.  Sex between you and your ex when the situation is not equal, means you end up feeling less than you are.  You become even more deeply emotionally frustrated and unhappy.  Because let’s be honest here, you want more and your ex is not offering you more when they’re sleeping with you, they’re using you as a sexual release.

Remember this also, as bad as you feel now, and I know you feel bad and worthless – you will NOT die from what you’re feeling.  As I said, it is a perfectly natural and normal to be going through what you’re going through.  It is, after all the end of your relationship.

Simple Tips to Get Your Ex Back

The first thing to accept is that sometimes no matter what you do or what you don’t do, your ex may not come back to you.  Some relationships are over when they’re over and if you can’t accept that and work at moving on, then you’re in for a tough time.

But if yours is one of the relationships that can be saved and you really want to get your ex back, then here’s how you go about it.

1. Let your ex know that you don’t want to lose him/her.  Let them know that they’re still important to you.
2. Make your ex see that they don’t want to lose you either.  You can best do this by not panicking when the breakup is announced.  You might be stricken inside, but let your ex know that you understand why they left and that you admire them for taking the decision.
3. Avoid creating drama and emotional terror when you’re with your ex, if you want to get your ex back, then you have to get your emotions in check and be someone who your ex will admire and desire.
4. If you want to get back with your ex, then you should take some time to get your head together, but once you’ve done that your goal should be to work towards a healthy and happy relationship with your ex and then see if there is really a chance the two of you can make a go of it.
5. Once you get to the friendship stage, you should make sure that the levels of communication between you and your ex are healthy and strong.  However you communicated in the past didn’t work, so develop new and stable methods.

So avoid looking desperate and needy!  Cut out the panic as quickly as you can!  Take some time on your own to get your head together and then work at a positive friendship.

If you want to get your ex back and are 100% serious about that, then this is as easier way to get them back as I know.

Be good to yourself, Dana!

Remember you can contact me directly for any help and advice, or information on The Magic Of Making Up right here…

CONTACT DANA

The 5 Stages Of Losing Your Love

First off, accept that whatever the deal breaker was, you were both to blame.  I mean, if you slept out on him, then whichever way you look at, he wasn’t giving you what you needed and that’s why you went looking.  If he slept out on you, then it’s you who wasn’t giving him what he needed. 

I know it’s not right to blame the one who was cheated on and that’s not what I’m doing, all I’m saying is that something was wrong and it takes two to make and keep something wrong.

If you want to get him back, you have to move on and forgive him.  A lot of people talk about ‘forgive’, but you shouldn’t ‘forget’ and of course you will never forget, but if you’re serious about giving it another go with him – you’re truly going to have to forgive whatever he did!

If you have to say you’re sorry for something you did, then you’re going to have to do that and you’re going to have to mean it.  In that sorry you’re going to have to explain why you won’t repeat your past behavior and you’re going to have to be convincing.

Guess what, if you want to get this guy back, you might have to do a little bit of chasing him.  Not in a stalkerish kind of way with the million texts and the hounding, no!  Just let him know you’re still there, you still love him and you’re going to give him a little bit of time and wait for him.  This is about parking the ego and putting yourself on the line!

Always remember there’s no absolute.  If he won’t or can’t forgive you, there’s a chance you might have to walk away.  But that’s not always the end of the world, there are other guys and other relationships out there for you.  Give yourself a bit of time and then start over fresh with a guy who will forgive and love you for who you are.

How Well Did You Really Know Your Ex?

The reason he might want more space could range from: family problems, insecurities or fear of commitment.  If you can figure out what the reason might be you just might be able to understand ”how to get my ex back.”

If you believe your ex boyfriend still has feelings for you, then you may just be in that great position to really control what happens from here on in.  Your best approach is to leave him alone for a few weeks.  Give him the space that he has asked for and let him think.

After a few weeks, make contact with him and strike up a conversation. You should make sure however way you decide to communicate with him, that you keep it short and sweet.  You want to appear as if you’re still there, but you also want to appear as though you’re getting on with your life, you don’t have a whole lot of time to talk and hold his hand, but equally you haven’t abandoned him.

If you play it right, he will eventually start to look back on your relationship and start to miss it and you.  The minute he turns one of your conversations around to reminiscing about the past, make sure it is a happy memory he’s remembering.

Now, if your boyfriend’s not responding as I’ve outlined, then you either need to accept that now is not the right time for your relationship and that he really does need more time on his own, or that the relationship is over and there is nothing you can do.  Only you know your relationship and what you feel. 

Take some time for yourself, sit with things and decide what you want to do.  After that the question of “how to get my ex back if he wants more space?”  might not be the question you’re asking yourself.  It might be, “is it time to move on?”

Now if you’re sure you want to continue in the relationship but you’re not having much success, rather than drive yourself crazy I would highly recommend that you get hold of The Magic Of Making Up, before it’s too late. The book will give you new ideas and guidance that will help you to get back your ex.

Do You Want To Get An Ex Boyfriend Back?

Let’s be honest, there are some relationships that are best left ended and over.  Relationships that involved physical and emotional abuse, that meant you were the third person intruding into an established relationship, relationships that didn’t allow you to be you and flourish in an atmosphere of respect and good will.

Trying to get any of those relationships rekindled is not a good idea and could even be physically and or emotionally dangerous, for one or both of those involved.

So before you set off and use some of the resources that I’ve suggested on this site, make sure that you ask yourself some serious questions and then you sit yourself down and answer them honestly.

Should you be really looking for a way to get your ex back?

If you’re sure getting your ex back is right for you, then go for it!  Act now and get your ex back with the wonderful The Magic Of Making Up.

Dana

How To Get Your Boyfriend Back

There’s really no point in just thinking that you want to get your boyfriend back, you really have to want it.

Once you’re sure that it’s want you want, then you need to go all out and do just that.

What that DOES NOT mean is that you become obsessive and fixated on doing nothing but thinking about your ex boyfriend.  Please don’t rush off and start doing all kinds of things like calling him constantly, texting him and trying to see him. 

No, your route back to your boyfriend is simple and it is all about you and focusing on YOU and NOT him!

“How To Get Back Your Boyfriend?”…Be Confident!

Confident people are very attractive.  If you appear confident you immediately become desirable. 

If you don’t believe me, go out and sit and watch people as they go about their business.  Just watch and see if you can spot the confident people in a crowd.  You will see that they have their heads held high, they have almost a smile on their faces and you are attracted to them.  Not necessarily in a sexual way, but the fact that you can spot them in a crowd tells you that you are attracted to them.

That’s what you’re going to do to get back your boyfriend.

You’re going to get out and about!  Reconnect with your family and friends and have some fun.  Take a class, get fit, do whatever it takes to stop you sitting in night after night fixating on your ex boyfriend.

I’ll admit it’s not going to be easy, but if you’re serious about this then you will do it, because it’s been proven to work.

So, don’t spend your time calling and texting your ex boyfriend.  Instead, show him that you’re getting on with your life and before you know it little questions will start firing off in his mind!

“What’s she up to?”  “I’ve not heard from her!”  “Thought she’d be calling and texting me!”  “Have I done the right thing leaving her?”

And once those questions start off, you’re on your way to getting your boyfriend back.

It’s not rocket science, but it DOES require a commitment from you!

For further help with this, why not take a look at The Magic Of Making Up.

Why Men Have Affairs